Caregivers juggle many roles. We’re parents, employees, and the list goes on.
I’m a caregiver.
I’m also a mother, entrepreneur, employee, friend, and sibling.
But before I’m in any of these roles, I’m Nicole.
I’ve been Nicole my whole life. I’ve only been a mother for 16 years and a caregiver for 13 years.
So, I honour my needs as Nicole first.
As a caregiver, you might think the idea of prioritizing your needs over your child with a disability is impossible and selfish.
I used to think that way too (check out this self-care video “Shifting Your Mindset" available in my support group for parent caregivers).
This article will teach you …
- How to break free of uninspiring routines
- Make the mundane fun
- Every day shouldn’t feel like a race
How to break free of uninspiring routines
It’s easy to get stuck in a daily routine that’s repetitive and uninteresting.
Routine makes my daughter with autism feel safe and secure, yet it makes me feel stifled.
Breaking free of a habit takes a conscious effect. As a caregiver, you deserve moments of joy in your day.
It’s heavy to take care of loved ones. The extra responsibility can be tiring and the last thing you want to do after a long or stressful day is take time for yourself.
So, let me ask you this:
Is there an opportunity to create a transition time that would give you some “me time” between when you walk in the door and need to start dinner and be with your family?
In just 5-15 minutes, you could play music (dance and sing), cuddle with a pet, walk around the block or do some mindful breathing.
There’s no right or wrong way to practise self-care. Even the small actions to disrupt your routine can make a big impact on your happiness.
Make the Mundane Fun
Change your mindset and change your mood.
Flip the switch on how you approach everyday tasks. If you’re cooking dinner, put on headphones and listen to music, dance in the kitchen or listen to a podcast while preparing your meal.
Sunday afternoons used to be my magic moment of batch cooking in the kitchen.
The kids knew they were not allowed in the kitchen while mommy was cooking.
This gave me time to relax, listen to music and sing while I was in my happy place.
If you want to get really creative, change up your activity based on the day.
Make a daily activity chart that allows for flexibility. Download a copy of my activity chart.
Every day Shouldn’t Feel Like a Race
Our bodies are always talking to us.
Are you listening?
Please believe me when I say that it’s not healthy for our bodies to be in a state of panic - our hearts racing every day of our lives.
When your heart races, you experience a fight-or-flight response (also known as acute stress response).
This release of hormones is meant to trigger you to fight or flee a harmful situation.
Repeated and long-term activation of the stress response takes a toll on the body.
Start listening to your body.
How are you feeling when you walk through the door? Are you still mad about something that happened at work? Are you frustrated by a phone call that you just finished?
Remember that when you walk in the house, no one will starve if you wait 15 minutes before preparing dinner. My lifesaver is having cut-up veggies ready in the fridge so people can snack while they wait for dinner—and then I don’t have to worry about them ruining their appetite.
Check-in with yourself throughout the day and assess whether you’re feeling tense or relaxed.
Another thing we sometimes forget is that we can always try things to see what works and adjust as we go. Tell your family about your change and ask for their support.
And most important: Acknowledge progress, celebrate progress and be proud of any and all progress.
This can be done by journaling a few minutes at the end of the day. Allowing for your head to hit the pillow with positive thoughts in your mind. Your future self will thank you.
- Break from your daily routine with small moments of joy
- Tell your family members when it’s “me time” and make set rules so you’re not interrupted
- Listen to your body for cues you might be stressed
- Prepare for your week in advance so you don’t feel rushed
- Keep a daily journal to acknowledge your feelings and progress
If you enjoyed this article, you’ll love my Facebook Community with training on how to practice self-care as a parent caregiver. Request to join here.